The Marines, being the Marines, switched DH's MEPS check-up from today (Friday) to tomorrow at the last minute.
The good news is that I now have him to myself today and Sunday. The bad news is he might be in lousy shape for being sociable tomorrow evening. His recruiter will pick him up around 4am for the drive into LA.
It's also bittersweet for us to have two days to spend as we wish because we left our car with DH's dad yesterday. Fortunately we don't have to go anywhere to snuggle! He's still sleeping right now, though, so I don't feel bad for poking around the internet.
As usual, some of that poking included time on a forum for military wives. Someone asked a question that I'd been wondering about for some time: How long is your DH in for?
Reading through the many replies, I wasn't surprised by what I saw. Overwhelmingly (ratio of about 3:1), the husbands were either planning to stay in for more than 10 years or had already served 10 years or more. The majority of this group are clearly making a career out of military service, some for 20 years, some for 30 (and others falling in between).
In contrast to the 76 votes for 10 years or more, only 23 answers (at the time of my counting) indicated 10 years or less, and some of these weren't confident that their spouses wouldn't stay in longer. Also, a number of responses fit the format of 'He's done about 8 so far and we're really not sure...' Depending on the exact wording, I dumped them into column A or B, but 10 replies were too on the fence for me to make a ruling, even for a study as unscientific as this.
Similarly, of the 76 answers that said their DH would remain in the military for 10 years or more, a substantial portion had 10 or fewer years of service completed, but were confident about their future, but left open the possibility of minds being changed.
Once again, I feel like someone on the fringes, and wonder if this is why there are fewer resources for people who are just getting into the military. When you know it's a job and experience rather than a career move, are you less inclined to seek out the community? Many people go to college for longer than the 4 years of active duty DH and I are headed into. Are the lifers wanting to tell me, "Four years is really a short time; stop thinking it's such a big deal"?
It is a big deal in your 20s, though. A large percentage of life, and the sort of commitment required is unprecedented. (I am of the opinion that while marriage is a big and important commitment, the military demands more sacrifices of personal freedom.)
It's a big deal, but I'm surviving, and will continue to do so.
--
Photo credit: dimtzanos
2 comments:
ha ha, I totally posted in that.
Our plan is to take it one enlistment at a time. Your minds will probably change a hundred times before he even has the option of re-enlisting.
The way we look at it is the following:
*R* is serving his country. We don't have anything holding us back from this service. Also, the Air Force is providing for our family and gives us the opportunity to see other parts of the country/world we would never think to experience.
He just re-enlisted for another 5 years and you're right it was a big deal. Especially for a young couple. But the way I see it, I have two choices, either accept the "military life" for what it is- an adventure, rollercoaster, sometimes miserable but a lot of times wonderful life! Or sit on the outside looking in and miss out on a lot of chances to really enjoy the ride.
It will get easier. Just keep a good attitude and don't worry too much. Just take it one itty bitty step at a time.
Sorry for the novel!
Hey, thanks for stopping by. :)
I will be keeping an open mind about what the future may hold for us, but I have to say that I'd be disappointed if my DH gave up his dreams of creating and storytelling to stay in the service.
I am looking forward to the opportunities and adventures waiting for us, though!
Post a Comment